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And now I see ….

One thing I’ve learned since leaving Islam and rediscovering Christianity—particularly Orthodox Christianity, which preserves the ancient faith of the early Church—is that the idea of Islam simply continuing the biblical story isn’t as straightforward as I once believed.

I wasn’t always a Muslim. I was born and raised Roman Catholic and spent over 48 years exploring different faiths and spiritual traditions. Looking back, many seemed to contain echoes of similar questions and longings, each reflecting humanity’s search for God.

When I embraced Islam, I genuinely believed it completed what had come before. But as I continued to study while I was still a Muslim, I came to a different conclusion. In fact, that growing conviction became one of the reasons I eventually left Islam.

While the Qur’an speaks respectfully of the Torah and the Gospel as revelations from God, Muhammad did not simply continue the biblical story as Christians understand it. The Qur’an rejects some of the New Testament’s central claims: Christ’s crucifixion, His resurrection, His divinity, His identity as the Son of God, and the Holy Trinity.

As a Muslim, I believed the Bible had been corrupted. Yet when I began examining the historical evidence, the early manuscripts, and the writings of the first Christians, I found myself confronted with something I could no longer ignore. The earliest Christians proclaimed the death and resurrection of Jesus centuries before Islam, and that message has remained at the heart of the Christian faith.

For me, I haven’t found a new story. I’ve come home to the oldest one—the Gospel of Jesus Christ, faithfully preserved in the Orthodox Church.

This isn’t written to attack anyone’s faith or to win an argument. It’s simply an honest account of where my search for truth has led me, and why I could no longer believe that Islam was the continuation of the Gospel as claimed, it was the attempt to change it.

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What is faith ?

This isnt a question that can be answered simply and I dont intend to claim to be a scholar simply a sinner that follows Christ.

For me faith in God is not like solving a maths problem where you reach a point of absolute proof and there is nothing left to question. God is not simply an answer we arrive at through logic — He is Someone we come to know, trust, and love.

Faith is not just believing that God might exist; it is the assurance that He is there and that we can place our trust in Him.

Because faith is a relationship, it can exist alongside doubt. Having questions or moments of uncertainty does not mean we have no faith. In fact, doubt can sometimes be part of a living faith because it shows we are searching, growing, and engaging with God rather than simply accepting things without thought.

Faith is not about being comfortable and never questioning; it is about taking the courage to step forward, to seek, and to discover more of God.

In this way, faith is an ongoing conversation with our doubts — choosing to continue trusting while we keep growing.

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The Moment Christ Found Me

How it came to be …. For me

My journey to Christ was not something I planned. It was not a decision I made simply with my mind. It was something that reached into the deepest part of me.

I had spent my life searching for God, searching for truth, searching for where I truly belonged.

During my journey, I had come to know Islam and sincerely tried to draw closer to God through it. I gave my heart to seeking, learning, praying, and understanding. But over time, I found myself struggling. I felt a distance growing inside me. I wanted to feel close to God, but something in my soul was still longing for something I could not explain.

Then came a moment I will never forget.

I was watching a documentary about Michael Jackson when something happened that I cannot describe as just a thought or an idea. A verse from Isaiah came alive to me in a way I had never experienced before.

It was as if the words were not simply being read — they were reaching me.

I felt it throughout my whole body. A physical reaction, a deep stirring, something that went beyond words. It felt like my heart was being awakened. In that moment, something inside me shifted.

Later, when I was struggling and questioning why I felt so far away from the closeness with God that I was seeking, Christ met me.

Not through an argument. Not through pressure. Not through fear.

Through love.

I think of Saint Photini, the Samaritan woman at the well. She came to the well carrying her past, her questions, and her thirst. She was not expecting to meet the Messiah that day. But Christ was there waiting for her.

He knew her completely, yet He still called her.

He offered her the Living Water.

When I look at her story, I see my own. I came carrying my searching, my struggles, my questions, and everything I had been through. And then Christ found me.

It felt like the same Living Water that He offered Photini was being offered to me.

Once again, I felt it through my whole being — not just as an emotion, but as something that reached my soul and my body. A feeling of being found. A feeling of coming home.

My whole life was transformed in a single encounter.

I had been searching for God, but I discovered that Christ had been searching for me all along.

Like Photini, I came thirsty.

And I left with the Living Water of Christ.

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Photini

Christ is Risen!

Over these past days, as I have walked this unexpected and life-changing path towards Christ, one Saint’s story has remained close to my heart: St. Photini, the Samaritan Woman.

When I first encountered her story, I felt something I cannot fully put into words. Here was a woman who came to a well carrying the weight of her past, searching for something that the world could never satisfy. Yet in one encounter with Jesus Christ, everything changed.

She came to the well seeking ordinary water, but she encountered the Living Water Himself.

Christ did not see her only through her past. He saw her as she was created to be. He spoke to her, revealed Himself to her, and called her into a new life. The woman who arrived carrying a water pot left it behind — and in doing so, she left behind the person she had been.

She went from searching for fulfilment in the things of this world to becoming a witness of Christ’s truth.

She went from the well as a seeker, and returned as an evangelist.

She went from carrying water, to carrying the message of God’s mercy and love.

Her story has deeply reflected my own awakening. Like Photini, I too have come to the well carrying my own history, my own questions, my own thirst for something greater. And through Christ, I have found the Living Water that I had been searching for all along.

That is why I chose the name Photini.

Not because I feel worthy of such a Saint’s name, but because her story reminds me of what Christ can do with a willing heart. She shows me that no past is too complicated, no journey too far, and no person too lost for the love of God to reach them.

St. Photini did not keep the revelation of Christ to herself. Once she encountered Him, she could not remain silent. Her whole life became a testimony of the One who had called her by name.

I pray that I may follow even a small part of her example — to leave my own water pot behind, to walk forward in faith, and to share the hope and mercy I have found in Jesus Christ.

St. Photini, my patron saint, pray for me.

May Christ continue to transform my heart, as He transformed yours.