There is almost no mention of rainbows in Islamic text, save for two hadiths attributed to Ibn ‘Abbas in Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 33/14, with one classified as sahih (authentic) as below, and another classified as da’īf (weak):
Ibn ‘Abbas said, “The rainbow is security for the people of the earth that they will not be drowned. The Milky Way is the door of the heavens and forms a furrow through it.”
If you had told me back in 2016, no wait 2015 that I would be where I am today I would have said you were absolutely MAD.
I would never have believed you that I would have got married within 48 hours of physically meeting in a country I’ve never been. I would never have believed that at 44 I would have had another baby. I would never of believed you that I would also divorce someone I truly loved 7 years later. I most certainly would never have believed you that I would have survived a global pandemic, had almost died twice or that I would have become Muslim.
You see there is our plan and there is Allah’s plan.
Whilst sometimes its difficult to see why certain things have to happen the way they do, especially when they are breaking our hearts or placing us so close to death, but everything is by design and for a reason, even if that reason is not clear to us.
It is always clear to Allah.
He heard the conversations you didn’t, he sees into the heart of everyone, believers and non believers. He sees the road, before you have placed even a foot onto it.
So if something is removed we must trust that it was for our own good and that he will replace it with something better
I view my path to Islam as one that was fraught with obstacles, things and people that sadly had to be removed as they were not supporting me in my growth , in my connection to a deeper truth. I will always carry them in a place in my heart as they were part of the journey I am now on, but I release them all with love.
Isha hit differently last night after what had been one of the most impossible weeks with test after test pushing me to the edge everytime .
Each test felt like I was being slammed against a brick wall like some crash test dummie leaving me mentally drained emotionally empty and physically in pain from complete exhaustion and yet every salah I turn to him but Isha on Friday night was different
For the first time in a long time I cracked I felt what it meant once again to truly open and let everything come flooding out. Sat in the darkness on my mat with nothing but me and Allah I cried and not from my eyes but from somewhere much deeper, throwing my arms in the air asking for relief for anything good to be sent as I AM in desperate need, then I fell head first to my mat and stayed there releasing all that burdened my heart had been released and my eyes could shed no more.
Exhausted I dragged myself to bed. Praying hoping Allah has heard me. Waking the next morning I woke late for Fajr as was so exhausted but not just from emotion but also a dream where a man silently stood in a desert just smiling reassuring me all is okay . I woke crying once again but this time tears of joy and confusion at what I had just experienced, but in my heart there was now a peace that wasn’t there before. So there will not be any questions or analysing it for interpretation, just acceptance.
Peace …. We are often sold peace, yes sold it. This Dunya would have you believe that you need to earn peace, either through endless self help courses or mediations or by getting the latest this or that the perpetual cycle of commercial need pedalling peace for a price. We are told That ultimate peace is something we must find outside of ourselves forever elusive always beyond our reach which is a lie.
Peace is about giving up that search, it’s surrendering our entire being to the one that created us. In surrendering we begin to come from a position of divine peace, mirroring love trust and compassion into this Dunya freely, without any expectation of receiving anything in return.
Knowing that peace isn’t something elusive or a final destination but found within ourselves and in every moment we experience
Alhamdulillah I am free from covid but have damage from it. Lung function is now lower and my energy is struggling due to reduced oxygen. This has in turn brought issues with my heart and circulation. So I am back on aspirin daily to reduce the risk of stroke or heart attack. I haven’t been able to pray so I have allot to catch up on.
As reverts we try to make sure we do everything perfect and try so hard and when we falter we are the hardest on ourselves for not being a good Muslim. This has to stop as no one is born perfect neither is anyone without sin or fault.
Doing our best with what we have is the best we can do. Allah doesn’t want us to struggle this is clear. Maintain your relationship with Allah as after all it is YOURS not anyone else’s
Is it new year is it ok to celebrate? This is the buzz on the Islamic groups and pages with endless posts of No to new year then met with others calling it extremism and others quoting Hadith’s and so on. I’ve notice since becoming a revert this internal backbiting and need to be right amongst some and it seems very similar to the battles pagans have with Christian’s regarding their holidays and so on. I understand very clearly how associating with religious festivals of others is absolutely Haram but Nee years and it’s association to the Gregorian calendar being pagan when we ourselves work live and get paid according to it seems a bit far fetched for me.
The religions of the world have a cleanser of festivals they honour but they all unless you are lucky enough to live in the country of your religion all work and live life according to the Gregorian worldwide so what’s the issue ?? I don’t see one other then it could promote activities that are haram but simply wishing someone a good year is not.
I may change my mind over this so will leave it open ended for future edits.
Last night was the worst yet. Between struggling to breathe and excruciating pain in my calves and bones I woke Alhamdulillah
I woke and breathed air into my lungs and gave thanks to Allah for putting me back
Today as I wrote this I am still struggling to breathe and go about the house without needing to stop or do things so slowly or I pass out but I am breathing I am alive I am grateful for every breath I breathe.
Questions come when we have tests and time such as why do we waste time with emotions and actions such as anger ignorance and insecurity with others when life is so short and death comes too soon. Death is the only thing we are guaranteed so why do we waste so much of life with these negative emotions and actions? Why aren’t we running towards the things we love instead of making excuses why we can’t when in one second this dunya could end. ?
Fear and anger are works of shaytan to remove you from Allah to remove you from peace and love
Today has been emotional still trapped in bed by covid hardly being able to breathe or move without passing out trying my best to cope with a house imploding around me trying to keep my faith that this is a test I shall pass from Allah to find my little girl has covid too.
To watch her get worse as the evening went on to be filled with flashbacks and have ptsd fears of when I almost lost her to sepsis …to the damage it’s left her with and care she needs I am struggling to keep my faith tonight.
Unable to get to my mat I call out to Allah to protect her to remove this covid to remove these thoughts these tears and worries that are weighing so heavy alone.
In the silence I hear my own body struggling to breathe
Seeking Sakina 